A Day in My Life
The irony of me writing this at this current moment is that I’m at camp, spending a week doing things that are not in my usual routine. However, spending this week away at Burn Camp is something I’ve done for the last nine out of ten years (HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE). So, technically it is part of my annual routine. Anyway. Earlier this week, one of my lab participants asked me how exactly I manage to raise a toddler, be a full-time student, work in a lab, and still have time for the activities (those IADLs!) that define who I am as an individual. That got me thinking, if she was interested in my daily routine, perhaps you, dear reader, might be wondering the same thing. So, here we are: a day in my busy, hectic, wonderful life.
6:00-6:30 am: Baer wakes up and wanders into our bedroom, still in his sleep sack. I’m usually still asleep, so he puts his head at my eye level and either tickles my arm or just whispers, “Mommy…” until I open my eyes. This used to scare the s h i t out of me; now, I’m used to it. If it’s a lazy day, I let him watch a little iPad (choosing from one of the 20 Spiderman shows that Disney+ has available) while I try to catch a few more zzz’s. If we have places to be, we use the toilet (yay potty training!) then head downstairs.
7:00-8:00 am: I’m very organized (most of the time), so I generally have my clothes and Baer’s clothes picked out the night before. He used to eat his breakfast while my husband or I made his lunch and got him dressed. Now, he wants to do everything himself (“let’s do it together!”), so there’s a lot of trial and error and hand-over-hand assisting. It’s time-consuming but also a lot of fun. Then we head off to school.
8:00-9:00 am: I drop Baer off at school. I’m so fortunate that our number one choice of schools for him is super close to our house and that it’s also convenient for me to get to school. Depending on the day and his mood, it can sometimes take us ages to get from the car to the classroom, but a lot of the time, he’s ready to get in there. Post drop-off, I grab a coffee at Starbucks (one of the few places I visit that still makes plain iced coffee!) and do the classic “Mom” move of sitting in the car and listening to a podcast while scrolling on my phone. It’s my Me Time.
The rest of the morning: This varies by time of year. During the semester, I’m usually on campus, reading and studying for my courses. Last semester, I was running numbers for my statistics classes 24/7! Since it’s the summer, I’m working on my literature review for my dissertation or making calls and sending emails to potential participants for my lab. That takes more time than I’d like to admit. When there’s some down time, I’m either catching up on my shows (just finished Blackbird on AppleTV and American Horror Stories on Hulu) or listening to my podcasts (The Daily and Pod Save America are my favorites. I’m also a subscriber to Sword and Scale because two episodes a month wasn’t cutting it for me).
Afternoon: When I have participants in the lab, they are there for three- to four-hour periods of time. These visits are usually scheduled for late morning and early afternoon, so that’s where you’ll usually find me! If I don’t have anyone scheduled, I try to do some housework (yuck) or run errands. I love grocery shopping; I find it very relaxing. That said, though, I don’t like putting the groceries away. Similar with laundry: I like sorting laundry but not actually doing it. And putting it away? Forget it!
4:00-5:30 pm: Time for Orangetheory! I usually attend the first afternoon class. If I have time, I’ll try to squeeze in a lift class in addition to the regular hour-long class. OTF is an addiction — if I don’t go to a class, I feel like my day is missing something.
5:30-6:00 pm: Time to pick up Baer. If this seems like a long day for him, that’s because it is. At first, I was nervous to leave him at school for so many hours. However, when I tried to pick him up earlier, he refused to leave (“too soon, Mommy”). Now we let him have his last visit to the playground, and we time the pickup to when he’s back in the classroom. This works for him and for me.
Evening: My husband has dinner ready by the time we get home. Baer is in a picky toddler phase, so while we put different foods on his plate, he usually ends up eating mac and cheese, pizza pie, or raviolis. I miss those baby-led weaning days where he ate everything I put in front of him! We usually watch a cartoon or two and take a family walk around the block. Baer is currently very into ants and bees, so our walks can take a veryyyyy long time. Once we get home, we begin the sleep routine: we play for about ten minutes in Baer’s room and then he gets a bath. Then there’s the general stuff: we brush his teeth and hair, we put on his pajamas and sleep sack, then read a few books. He crawls in bed and either my husband or I stay with him until he falls asleep (yes, it’s a crutch but we’re working on it). Good night, Baer! See you in the morning (or at midnight, or 2:00 am, or 4:00 am…).
Bedtime: I’ve learned that I need to thoroughly exhaust myself before I hit the hay, otherwise I toss and turn for hours before taking an anti-anxiety pill. I turn off the lights except for my bedside lamp and read for as long as it takes before my eyes start to feel heavy. Currently, I’m reading Booth by Karen Joy Fowler, but some recent favorites include Trustby Hernan Diaz and This Time Tomorrow by Emma Straub. Then I turn on a podcast (either Dateline or They Walk Among Us. When Nate’s out of town, though, I use the Calm app because I just can’t do a true crime story then). I would like to say that I sleep through the night every night, but this is just not the case. It’s getting better though… Like I said, physically exhausting myself seems to be the trick, but that’s not possible all the time.
It’s a busy life, but it’s a good life. It’s a life that looks very different than just nine months ago. And yet… it works. Baer’s sleeping better, he’s almost totally potty trained, I’m able to prioritize school and work, and our family is making a life for ourselves in our new hometown. There are bad days, and there are worse days, but it’s generally a smooth and happy existence, and I know how fortunate I am that this is my life.